Friday, February 29, 2008

Struggling for Momentum

Two weeks ago I weighed in and gained .4 pounds. I was sick and didn't exercise and had been eating more comfort foods. Fine. Last week I stayed the same. I was in the midst of my cycle and figured I was bloated. Fine. This week I lost .2 pounds. See the point in front of the 2? Not fine. I did all my workouts this week and stayed within my Weight Watchers points allotment. You all know I had a weekend in Southern California that included a calorie-laden meal at Ruth's Chris. But I ate clean the rest of the week and really didn't think it was going to be a factor.

There are many reasons I can drum up for why I didn't lose more. And I'm determined to just keep trudging along with the faith and knowledge that if I do that I will lose the weight, even if it is .2 pounds at a time. I just figured out it would take me nearly 4 years to get to goal at .2 pounds per week. And you know what? That's ok. The problem is momentum. I'm feeling a little stuck, stalled.

I do this every time I have a weigh-in that is vastly different from what I think I earned through exercise and diet. It's almost like a little rebellion. But I'm feeling like I need a good sized loss to get a little momentum going. How about over a pound? And it's so hard not to compare to others. I was talking with a woman on the WW message boards when I noticed she lost almost all the weight I need to lose (about 85 pounds total) in a year. Ugh. Ok, I'm definitely letting that one go.

Today is gym day. I'm going to go. I'm going to go. I will go.

In reading over my post I just realized that by saying, "I did everything I was supposed to and didn't lose weight and that's not ok" I'm sort of blaming some unknown thing. This is my body, my choices, my exercise, my goals. If I didn't lose weight it's not unfair. By saying that I'm giving away my power to some outside source. I don't know why I didn't lose more but I know I will in the future. Through making better choices, exercising, keeping at this. I'm going to keep saying this until I believe it again

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Life, Love and Longevity

I'm sitting on the plane in Long Beach, waiting to start our flight back to the Bay Area. Dinner at Ruth's Chris Steakhouse was great! I had a Seared Ahi appetizer that was incredible. It rivaled a seared ahi I had in Florida once. Very tasty and probably pretty healthy. Miguel had a bowl of Lobster Bisque that was so creamy and tasty. It tasted like Lobster Butter/Cream Soup, just so rich. I had quite a few spoonfuls of that.

For my entrée I had a petit filet and grilled jumbo shrimp. Oh, and Onion Rings Plus lots of yummy foods being passed around - mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes (which tasted like pie filling, so sweet), a few bites of salmon, etc. And desert. Miguel and I shared a banana cream pie desert. Very tasty and again, very rich. Lord knows how many calories I consumed but in the points tracker the meal added up to 28 points, which would be around 1400 calories. I wouldn't be surprised if it was quite a bit more in reality.

Here's a picture of my grandparents at dinner...

Aren't they just the cutest? 65 years together and still going strong. They had four children and 8 grandchildren and now a batch of great-grandchildren. My Nana was telling me how they had the smallest wedding cake due to sugar rationing when they got married. They've seen a lot these two.

So, it was worth a few (hundred) calories to help them celebrate the milestone. The good news is I went to the gym yesterday and earned 5 activity points. I don't usually eat APs but I did yesterday. I needed 'em. And, in general, I made better choices than in the past. I skipped alcohol, which would have been more calories and decreased my judgment. I know I ate less because I walked away without that stuffed feeling. I made healthier choices; in the past I would have ordered the Rib Eye instead of the Filet and the fried Calamari instead of the Seared Ahi. Better choices, plus exercise, plus a really nice meal out which I got to indulge in and enjoy - not a diet, a lifestyle.

Still deciding if I'm going to the gym today. Just depends on how I feel after being home for a while. Getting up at 4am has left me a little sleepy but we'll see.

UPDATE: I made it to the gym! I'm so glad it stays open until 7pm on Sundays. I closed the place down finishing up my stretching right at 7. I did hanging leg raises actually hanging from those arm things! I'm very excited about that. And my C25k Week 2 Day 4 was pretty much a cake walk (!!). I feel great. I'm so glad I went. Gym days again tomorrow and Wednesday and let's hope that means a loss on Thursday. I have to eat really clean too since I used all my extra points at dinner last night.