Friday, July 27, 2012

Teaming up with my Subconscious

First off I want to thank my good friend Kristy for her endless support on my journey.  I also want to thank Lyza, Cherry, and Sheryl for giving me some support after my last post.  It always helps to be given tips, support and reminders to keep things in perspective.  Despite an expected gain this week (I'm up .8 pounds over last week) I'm actually doing pretty well.  I went to the gym after work yesterday and started with a 25 minute run on the treadmill.  My treadmill runs lately have been to run at 6.0mph most of the time but every 5 minutes I run faster for one minute.  Yesterday I ran the "faster" at 7.0mph!  Would you get ahold of me?!  So at minutes 5, 10 and 15 I ran at 7.0 for one minute.  But at minute 20 I ran at 7.0 for two minutes.  That about killed me.  Except it didn't.  I did my cooldown and then hopped off the treadmill feeling quite pleased with my speedy self.

After the run I did legs/shoulders/core for strength training.  I'm still getting accustomed to change in my routine.  I was doing curtsy lunges and I think I lunged a bit too far back because my left glute was not happy.  I had to baby it for the rest of the workout.  Which was a better option than pushing through and then possibly landing on the DL for a couple days.  The DL, for those that don't watch sports, is the disabled list.  That's the term in our household, picked up from one too many SF Giants games.  Anyway, my workout was fabulous.  I got home late and had to scrounge together a weird dinner of string cheese, 2 crackers, 1/3 of an avocado, and a corn on the cob.  Oh, and lots of fruit salad.

Oh, but I'm forgetting to tell you about the most interesting part of my day yesterday.  I went to see a hypnotherapist.  I have been interested in hypnosis for a while now.  And not the cluck-like-a-chicken TV version but the real deal, which is more like a deep state of relaxation.  I saw a Plum District deal for a session with William Song in San Francisco so I went for it.  And he was amazing!  He did a consultation first and then the session.  He spent over an hour explaining the hows/whys of hypnosis as well as getting a solid understanding of what I wanted to address.  And what did I want to address?  Food of course.  But very specifically, I wanted to address those "episodes" I used to have about once every month or two where I would start eating and couldn't seem to stop despite a conscious desire to stop.  Those food meltdowns, as I have been known to call them, really bug the heck out of me.  I think it's the overwhelming feeling of being out of control that really unnerves me.  In any case, that's what I chose to work on with William.

So the first hour or so were spent learning about how William practices and identifying my issue.  The main goal is to get the subconscious and the conscious working as a team.  Powerful idea, right?  After a short stroll around the office building, we started the session.  William taught me how to get to a very relaxed state so my subconscious mind was accessible.  It wasn't about waving a watch in front of me and putting me into a trance, it was about getting verrrrrryyyy, relaaaaaaaxxxxed.   Then the conversation ensued in which ideas, thoughts, beliefs, etc, were exchanged.  I don't feel capable of explaining the whole process but I can summarize by saying I walked out with a plan to change the habit by changing my beliefs about the habit, as well as my belief about my control over the habit, as well as my behaviors.  I have to say I feel I was ripe for this type of experience.  So much of what I've learned goes hand-in-hand with what William espouses.  Self efficacy, gentleness, non-judgmental encouragement, and being willing to take an active role in your own change process.  Or THE active role in your own change process.  I don't expect it will be too long before I say, "Who was that woman that stood at the kitchen counter eating a bowl of cereal (and getting angry about it) at 11 o'clock at night?".  One thing that's already different is I can think about those episodes without feeling tension and frustration.  I am managing it.  I can manage.  That's a positive thing already.  I have a feeling I'll be back.  If you're curious about my experience and have more questions feel free to email me.  My email link is at the bottom of my FAQ page.

I'm off to the gym after work today.  Miguel is going fishing with some friends so I'll be on my own this evening.  And he works tomorrow so I'll be on my own tomorrow too!  I'm taking the kids to a pool party.  I think I'll pack my own food for snacking.  And in the evening I'm doing a homemade Thai dinner with a friend.  I went to the Asian market and got all the fun, exotic ingredients.  That should be fun!  That's my only social meal planned for this week where I'll be less than particular about what I eat.  The rest of the week - game on! 


  1. Food Meltdown... Oh man.. I had one of those this week. And it lasted for two days. It was rough. But I have not given up.

    I am so glad that you had such experience with the hypnotherapist. You deserve to feel good about your self and deserve to feel motivated.

    Look at how far you have come. Don't worry if you have an off day, or an off week. The fact is.. your still motivated to do something about it. You still are trying new things and your still writing on your blog. :)

    Keep going girl! Your inspiring! And I know you can do it!

  2. Sounds like your mind is set on controlling the mindless eating. I have N.E.H every so often (Never Ending Hunger). It is a horrible disease.

    1. Sounds awful! If mine involved actual hunger I might feel better about it. In fact, it's the total absence of hunger and the absence of what I might call true desire for food that makes me so irritated by it. I am planning on this doing the trick! Besides, if I'm not the one in control, who is?

  3. Thanks for being so kind to mention me. I really have enjoyed discovering your blog. You share a lot of great insight that makes me feel like I am not alone. I really appreciate that you shared your experience with a hypnotherapist. It's something I've been curious about trying for a long time. Nice to hear someone's thoughts on it. I agree with Paige, above. You deserve to feel good about yourself. Keep pushing forward. You've got others, like me, looking up to you! ;)

  4. GAME ON is right! I find such encouragement from your posts, Michelle - thank you again for posting.


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