I had so much more I wanted to get done yesterday. I bet most of you can relate.
Anyway, this was a follow-up to my appointment with Dr I'm-so-busy three weeks. Can you tell I'm still irritated? I need to get over it.
Anyway, yesterday we talked about how I'm not coughing and the wheezing is much improved but still sometimes flares up. So she's sending me for a pulmonary function test to see what's happening there and to an allergist (thank you to the reader that suggested I ask about that) to see if there might be allergy triggers.
Other than that, I got a haircut...Thanks Susana!
And also did a lot of blog-related stuff. Blog maintenance work is surprisingly time consuming. And then...I went to the gym. I started with 25 minutes on the elliptical. I'm always surprised at what a tough workout you can get from that machine. I got off all sweaty and out of breath! Then I did a little bit of weights again, taking a stab at some shoulder and back stuff. I'm so wanting to be able to do what I did before and also know that's going to take time. The fact that I'm so enthusiastic about it is a great sign though!
Ok, last thing...my eating. Last night...do we have to talk about this? Yes, it always helps when I put it out there. I'm just going to write it...two bowls of Fruit Loops (don't ask why these are even in the house (hint: it's Miguel's fault) - lame excuse, I am entirely responsible for both keeping them in the house and for eating them), two chocolate chip cookies (the rest of which are now gone) and a random mix of snacks while cooking dinner (food I found left in the kids lunch pail - granola bar, string cheese) and other food I just sought out for no good reason - pita chips and possibly something else I'm not remembering.
So today I woke up feeling disappointed in myself. Mostly that I'm in a hole and yet continue to dig. I did a lot of self talk.
"What's done is done, don't let it bring you down today."
"Yesterday's mistakes are already in the past, let them go."
"I've done nothing that can't be undone through making healthier choices."
"THIS feeling is why I want to make better choices, I don't feel good. The food was a temporary feel-good, this negative feeling is worse and not worth it."
"There are other ways to soothe myself in the evening."
You get the idea. So today I'm making better choices, right? Not so much. I'm on a lunch break at an all day training. Someone brought Girl Scout cookies and Almond Roca. I've been snacking on those. I brought a Fage, a banana and mandarins. I am committing, right now, for myself, to eat no more GS cookies or Almond Roca. I'm going to think out loud here for a moment..."I know I will feel better at the close of the day if I keep my commitment to myself, I can do this, for me, because I want something more, something that Girl Scout cookies and Almond Roca won't give me."
There, I feel a bit better already. Thanks for listening.